All we have now are memories and your pictures in a frame.
Cassidy said something to me this morning while watching this that kind of broke my heart. She said "Mom, I don't really remember Shawn. I only know him from the pictures we have. But that's probably because I wasn't alive when he was hu?" I really struggled to answer that. I told her "No, you were alive, it was only 3 years ago." Then I wondered if I was remembering Shawn and helping my children remember him like I should be. He is of course their uncle, and they should know he loves them and is a big part of our family. I felt like I had let my kids down. I know that the reason she doesn't really remember him is because he wasn't around much and she was only 4 when he died. But still...I need to do better.
So I am so grateful Mandy made this amazing tribute video for Shawn! I feel very privileged to have such an amazing brother. Even though we had him for only 29 short years, we have an eternity to look forward to. Its hard to believe its been almost 3 years. I have personally grown so much because of the loss we have experienced as a family. Would I want to do it over again? I'm not sure, honestly. But this I do know....I wouldn't change anything that I have learned or the tender mercies of the Lord that have been showered upon my family. Would I give anything to have Shawn and Todd back? Of course, but that is not my choice or the plan of our Father in Heaven. Until that day when we meet again and I get to feel their big arms embrace me, I will remain strong and of good courage because I know there is a greater plan for us.
Shawn,
I feel your presence at times when I am struggling and also when I'm happy. I am so grateful you are close by. So do as you've always done, watch over me, stand up for me, and protect me just like you use to when you were here on this earth. I will do my best to make you proud to call me your sister. I love you!
*Make sure to pause the music player at the bottom of my page so you can hear the song along with the pictures, its amazing!
